


Happy Galentine's Day

by AgentDot



Category: Guardians of the Galaxy (Movies)
Genre: Galentine's Day, Gen, Humor, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 17:25:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9774380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgentDot/pseuds/AgentDot
Summary: Peter gives Gamora a Valentine. Things don't work out as planned. Hilarity ensues.





	

  
_Peter Quill, StarLord, ultimate badass,_ he repeated to himself as beads of sweat formed on his upper lip.   _You can do this._  


Gamora was sitting right there, right there, and all he had to do was approach her. He knew that she could snap his neck faster than he could blink, and he was careful to clear his throat slightly as he sauntered toward her.  Surprising Gamora was not a good idea.  

 

She looked up briefly from her tablet when he entered the room. As he worked his way toward her, she found she couldn't keep her eyes off of him. "Peter... are you injured? You are walking in an... odd manner."

 

  
_Dork. Nice casual walk._ He grimaced slightly and turned it into what he hoped was a charming smile. "Um... no, no, just didn't want to bug you if you were doing something important."   _Keep smiling._  


 

Gamora sighed. "Too late.  What is it?" She kept her eyes on the tablet, giving Peter as little of her attention as she could manage.

 

"This is for you." He pulled an envelope from his jacket and handed it to her with a flourish.

 

"Thank you."  She set it beside her and went back to her tablet.

 

Peter stood there for a moment, a bit dazed. "Um, you should open it." He smiled again. _Not too wide, you're not desperate, you twit._  


 

Gamora picked up the envelope, cocked her head slightly, then grabbed it with both hands and started to rip it in half. 

 

"NO! Um, not like that..." Peter realized, almost too late, that not every alien race may be familiar with the concept of a "card".  He gently took it from Gamora's frozen hands and ripped the envelope open on one end. "There's something in there for you."

 

She looked puzzled and slightly worried.  Peter kept smiling. _Is this smile getting creepy?_ He tried to look solemn and yet happy at the same time.

 

Finally she drew out the pink paper inside.  She flipped the card open and said, "Is this Terran? I don't read Terran."

 

Peter froze for just a moment, wondering if he should explain that Terran isn't actually a language, and kicking himself for realizing, too late, that of course Gamora wouldn't read it. "Well, um, it's kind of symbolic more than anything. That's a red heart that says "Amora", with a teeny little G in front of it because that's your name, see, and then below that it says, um, be my valentine." _Wow does that ever sound dorky out loud. Should have thought this through._  


Gamora seemed either entranced or possibly constipated, Peter wasn't really sure which.  At least she wasn't furious.  Then her eyes darkened and she hissed, "I belong to no man! I am no man's Galentine!"  A pause, then "What is a... Galentine?"

 

Peter had already started to duck when the hissing started, so he had to come back up to answer her question.  "Um, a Valentine, it's just a friend.  A good friend. Like you and I, we fought together, right? Friends.  Like that. I want to be good friends." _Friends? Yeah, that's about as far as you're ever gonna get with that attitude._  


Gamora seemed placated. "I consider you my good friend as well, Peter Quill."  She smiled slightly at him.  When he said nothing, she added, "I am indeed your Galentine, and I consider you to be mine as well." 

 

  
_What happened to my plan to invite her to my quarters to discuss the further celebrations on this special Terran day?_  Peter turned away and headed away, nowhere really, just away.  It had been a long time since he'd given a girl a Valentine, and although arguably this was the best it had ever gone... he muttered curses when he was sure he was out of earshot.

 

\------

 

He was so caught up in his failure to even get into sight of first base with Gamora that he didn't even notice Rocket quietly padding past him in the opposite direction, carrying baby Groot under his arm.  Rocket and Groot stopped and watched Peter disappear down the hall, still cursing under his breath.  

 

Rocket snorted. "Terrans.  Wonder what got into him. He should be outside seeing the sights, first vacation we've had on a civilized planet and he's in here."  

 

They passed a doorway and saw Gamora sitting there, smiling slightly, looking at a piece of pink paper. "This I gotta see."  He turned into the room and walked as though he were intending to go past Gamora to another console. At the last moment he turned his head toward Gamora and pulled back with as shocked a look as he could muster. "Oh Gamora, I didn't see you there!" Then, unable to wait any longer, he pointed to the card. "What is that? Where did you get actual paper? It must have cost you a fortune!" 

 

"A fortune?" Gamora smiled wider. "It was a gift from Peter. I am-- he is MY Galentine."

 

Rocket blinked at her for a moment, full of questions but not wanting to appear uninformed. "Kinky. Well, we gotta go."

 

"I am Groot?"

 

"Oh, um, Groot doesn't know what a Galentine is. Can you believe that? Ah ha ha heh."  He looked at Gamora, hoping she'd take the bait and explain more. She just shrugged and went back to her work.  She realized she didn't actually know exactly what a Galentine was. She opened a search window on her tablet.

 

"I am Groot!" 

 

"What do you mean It's a V and not a G? You're not making sense."

 

"I am Groot."

 

"Oh, you were in the room when Peter was making that paper thing?  Did he explain what it meant?"

 

"I AM Groot."

 

"Giving gifts to good friends, huh." Rocket paused for a moment. "Hey, why didn't he give us anything? Ungrateful bastard. Sure, it's not bad enough that I'm stuck living as some kind of freak, I don't even have anyone who would give me a gift."

 

"I am Groot."

 

"Yeah, I probably should lay off the sauce. Makes me all weepy. That reminds me, I'm on vacation, I think I'm gonna take a nap, Sprout." They had arrived at Rocket's quarters. He set Groot down on the table and flopped down on his bed, curled up into a ball.

 

Groot watched his friend for a moment, then hopped off the table with a determined look in his knotty little eyes.

 

\------

 

Peter decided that he might as well head into the city and see the sights. There was only one sight he really wanted to see, but she didn't get the point to Valentine's Day. He wasn't going to just come out and tell her he loved her. He had to find some alien holiday that meant the same thing.

 

He was almost to the end of the docking hallway when he saw Drax coming toward him. He was wearing some kind of hat made out of pink bubbles, and was wearing shoes that occasionally arced little lightning strands to the metal deck he was walking on. "Boring Human! You must go and enjoy the festival currently occurring in the city!"  

 

In his enthusiasm, Drax was gesturing with his hands and several clusters of bubbles were shearing off around him, one drifting perilously close to Peter's face.  Peter's mind had just started cataloging the various ingredients that might be in an alien bubble when Drax snatched it out of thin air. "You may attain your own Glogpile. This one is mine! I won it in glorious battle!"  With that, Drax continued back toward the ship. 

 

Peter wandered for a while among the alien races. It was a nice change to not be wanted by the authorities, but it did take away a certain spice to life. Finally he found people gathered around a ring of what looked like giant bubble tea dispensers. Ten contestants were sitting in front of what looked like a shallow fishbowl. A buzzer went off and several fish-like creatures were released into each bowl. A timer started counting down by each station. Each entity started doing face plants into the bowl, usually coming up with nothing, but sometimes triumphant with a fish in their mouth! One of the fish was obviously not the one you wanted to get, as those who touched it usually shot up out of their chairs screaming, at which point attendants grabbed them and removed the spiny fish suddenly attached to their face. They were out of the game.

 

Finally the buzzer sounded and a winner emerged, a pointy-faced alien that had managed to grab out all the fish except the spiky one. The crowd roared and shouted as one, "GLOGPILE!" The winner stood and grinned as the pipe above them opened and they were covered in bubbles.  As they ran past him squealing in delight, Peter grabbed at a few loose spheres. He looked around and then popped one in his mouth. "Huh. Tutti Frutti."

 

The excitement and the fun just drew his eyes to all the happy couples around him. There. He'd seen the sights. Now he could go back to the ship. 

 

\------

 

Hours passed. The city's festivities ramped to a fever pitch, then faded away as the night turned into morning.  Rocket turned over in his bunk and slowly opened his eyes, to see Groot's dark orbs staring back, just past the end of Rocket's furry nose.

 

"Geez, warn a guy! Have you been there all night?"  He sat on the edge of his bed. His head felt like it weighed more than a Guaravian bundabeest. 

 

Groot nodded. Then he carefully brought his hands out from behind his back, actually rotated them at the shoulder, his clasped hands coming over his head. 

 

"Creepy. Don't do that.  What the heck--"

 

Groot's hands had formed into an impenetrable root ball around whatever he was holding. Rocket rolled his eyes.  He was getting a bit tired of all the things that Groot had forgotten about and was now amazed by. If it was another Narn Cricket, he was going to eat it.  "Well... I'm waiting."  

 

Groot smiled a tiny smile and a tiny crack appeared in the roots.  They opened like a clamshell, and a deep red light bathed the room.  Groot was holding a sculpture of a small red heart, and it was glowing. It wasn't just a sculpture though, the inside of the heart moved as though it were formed from fluid that was rushing around and around. Rocket reached toward it, mesmerized.  Just as he was about to touch it, Groot slammed his hands shut.  "I am GROOT!" 

 

"I wasn't going to actually touch it. Honest." Rocket looked like he didn't even half expect Groot to believe him.

 

"I am Groot."  

 

"For... me? Happy... awwww you little lug, come here." Rocket caught Groot up in a hug.

 

"I am Groot." Groot whispered happily into Rocket's ear.

 

"WHAT?" Rocket grabbed Groot by both arms and held him as far away from himself as he could. "An INFINITY STONE?" Where the Hell did you get that?  Didn't you see what happened with the last one? You go put that back where you got it!" 

 

"I am Groot?"  The little plant man looked like he was about to cry.  

 

Rocket put his hand on Groot's shoulder. "Are you kidding me? I don't know how you got it, but it must have been a lot of trouble.  I didn't think anybody would go to that amount of trouble for me. Thanks buddy."

 

Groot grinned and ran to a small conduit just off the floor, jumped in, and disappeared. "I am Groot!" he called back over his shoulder.

 

As Rocket sat there shaking his head, he heard the comm on his door beep. "Drax, requesting entry!"  

 

"What now? Enter, like I could stop you."

 

Drax strode in confidently, as he did everything else. "You could indeed not stop me,  ball of fur, for I am large and strong. Greetings aside, what just happened in your domicile? I felt a strange need to come this way." 

 

Rocket cursed silently.  Hopefully Drax was the only person within the range of the infinity stone during that short time. "Oh that was just Groot giving me a Galentine's present. He's, uh, going through tree puberty, and his pheromones and stuff are probably all outta whack, that's what must have affected you."  Rocket sold the lie with a grin that showed most of his teeth.

 

Drax was unfazed. "Puberty caused me to slay three people. I hope his passes quickly, in the meantime I shall be on alert."

 

"You do that. Anyway, Peter gave one to Gamora and then Groot gave one to me. I don't really get it."

 

"The ugly pink one seemed to be in poor spirits when I passed him yesterday. 

 

Rocket looked up at the mountain of a man and considered all the possibilities before him.   He knew what they had to do.

 

\------

 

Peter woke up late.  He had trouble convincing himself to get up out of bed.  What was the point?  Gamora was never going to even notice him.  Finally he let out a huff of air and finished his morning routine.  Maybe his crew would be tired of the planet and they could go out and find something to do that would distract him from things that were never, ever going to happen for him.

 

Just as he was about to go down to the mess for lunch, his door chime sounded.  "You're not naked in there are ya? Because nobody wants to see that." 

 

"Come in, Rocket," Peter rolled his eyes and turned away.  Irritating little whatever he was probably needed to borrow money.

 

"SURPRISE!" Peter jumped slightly, suddenly too aware that he didn't have a weapon within reach.  Still, that wasn't normally a battle cry. He slowly turned back to see Drax, Gamora, Rocket, and Groot in the doorway. Drax was carrying a large box. 

 

"HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!" Drax roared, slamming the box down on a nearby table and hitting the glowing red button on top of the box. It started to unfold by itself.  

 

"Am I still asleep?" Peter pinched himself. Ow. No such luck.

 

Gamora actually looked happy. "I am so sorry that I was too busy to let you explain more, Peter. You did not tell me that Valentine's Day was a special day to be spent celebrating with the ones you love!"

 

Rocket's eyes were gleaming.  "Pull up a chair!"

 

Peter's eyes went wide as he saw the display that had grown up around the table. He read the banner at the top. "Glogpile... the home edition?"

 

Drax nodded with glee. "I had to sign so much paperwork to get permission to buy it! Several of the chemicals are banned on at least seven planets!  So exciting!"

 

Peter started backing away, but Gamora gently took his arm. "Come on Peter, we'll share a bowl. There's only room for four players."  She placed two chairs close together and leaned against him as they sat down. 

 

The buzzer sounded and suddenly the alien fish things appeared in each bowl. Drax started plunging his head down into the bowl with abandon, sending water everywhere. Rocket poked his nose in the water over and over again, but each time came up sneezing.  Groot was swimming around in his bowl, which seemed to be fruitless until he caught the fin of a fish in his little wooden mouth.  The fish was startled into circling the bowl furiously, Groot hanging on and grinning like the maniacal little sapling that he was.

 

Gamora and Peter smiled at their friends and then looked toward their own bowl.  Each gestured the other to go ahead. Then they both started moving at once.  They ended up cheek to cheek just above the water.  Peter acted before he could think too hard about it. He swiveled his head to the side and kissed her, just a quick peck.

 

Her head snapped around and just as Peter was about to scream something about it all being a misunderstanding, she pressed her lips to his ever so briefly. They both grinned then, just as Drax shouted "I AM VICTORIOUS!" and then laughed in glee as the nozzle of the game sprayed him, covering him in orange bubbles. 

 

Maybe getting together with friends wasn't such a bad thing after all.  Gamora's kissing was getting more and more frenzied.  To his surprise, she had horrible breath.  He always assumed she would taste like mint, if anything, what with being green and all. Then she bit his lip, HARD, and he jumped up with a yelp.

 

The dream shattered, he sat up from the pile of... what WAS that? No, don't look- whatever he was sitting in.  The light was dim, and he yelped again (in a very manly way, he would later attest) when the rat-lizard-thing that was sitting on his chest skittered down his side and away into the darkness. 

 

He looked up and down the alley quickly.  It was full of garbage piles like the one he was currently sitting in.  In the distance he could see the lights of the festival and, after picking what he desperately hoped was the peelings of some vegetable out of his ears, he could hear the music as well. 

As his eyes became used to the dark he was able to see something else... several humanoid figures coming toward him.  He panicked slightly. _What would StarLord do?_  He had no weapons on him, who needed to be armed to go to a fair when you weren't a wanted man?  He really didn't want to be witness to some shady back alley dealings.  He really, really, didn't want to lie down in the sticky mass of refuse either. Before he could decide if they'd believe he was dead if he just slumped forward, he heard one of them shout "THERE HE IS!"

 

Drax, Rocket, and Groot started running toward him.  Gamora stayed behind them, looking amused. Peter groaned and wondered if it was possible to actually get below first base with someone, like maybe negative first base or not even at the ballpark yet.

 

"Find anything good?" Rocket looked around and lifted a few unrecognizable items off of Peter's legs. "You're not going to find much here, this is restaurant garbage. The good garbage is behind tech repair shops."

 

Peter stood and brushed himself off as much as he could.  "I wasn't looking through the garbage, I thought I heard someone screaming for help down this alley, but I slipped and fell.  Must have just heard a rat."

 

Rocket was busy eyeing another nearby pile.  Groot was in his arms, smiling up at Peter.  Gamora had an eyebrow raised, but wasn't questioning Peter's story.  Drax was gazing at Peter with love in his eyes.  With-what?

 

Peter tried to step back as Drax stepped up and grabbed his shoulder.  "The rodent has informed me of your need for companionship. I, Drax the Destroyer, will be your Galentine!"  Peter's face was frozen in shock. He didn't want to smile and encourage Drax, but he was pretty sure that NOT being Drax's - wait, what?

 

"Galentine?" Peter said, trying to postpone the moment when Drax might feel compelled to hug him, or worse.

 

"Yes, we consulted the Terran database and discovered that Galentine's Day is a time to celebrate close friendships!"  Drax grinned even wider, then became somber.  "We have bled in battle together.  I am proud to be your Galentine, and you mine." Then he dropped his hand from Peter's shoulder and started walking toward the celebrations.  "Come, let us celebrate!"

 

Rocket looked Peter up and down.  "Yeah, yeah, we're Galentines, whatever. I'm not touching ya."  

 

"I am Groot," said Groot with a nod, and reached out to touch Peter's pant leg.

 

"Don't touch that! You don't know where it's been!" Rocket grabbed Groot and bounded off after Drax.

 

Peter and Gamora followed them.   _You can still save this, StarLord.  Make conversation, you idiot._  


"Hey, I had this crazy dream that we bought a tiny version of Glogpile to play at home on the ship."  Gamora smiled.  

 

"That _is_ crazy.  Terrans can't even play Glogpile!  So many chemicals toxic to humans! You would have died!" She laughed.

 

Peter's eyes got wide.  "Oh, yeah, crazy.  Look, I'm going to take a quick shower, maybe brush my teeth, a lot, I'll catch up with you later."

 

As Peter hustled back to the ship he was humming.  At least he made her laugh.

 


End file.
